Saturday, August 4, 2012

Up the duff

Firstly, I need to apologise for the lack of blogging to any followers.  However I have had a case of unplanned reconcideration towards this page, blogging and communication.
You see I have had case of severe writers blog block, straining to justify to myself that every post I write should be a direct link to being childfree or childless, as I am not actually consumed, obsessed or even a dweller with categorising myself as this.  I merely just have no children.
I began this site as I noticed the overwhelming presence of mummy blogging and no real presence of the in betweeners. 
One mummy blogger caught my attention as she continually exuded positivity to her followers, a secure platform for all mothers to join and a motto to all to “take care of your children’s mother. 
This struck a cord with me as although I did not follow all that was relevant to motherhood blogwise.  It was a reminder to all mothers to remember, nurture and take care of themselves and their identity -  Who they were before they were mothers.  Which realistically rings true to all of us. 
Suddenly we are all grown up and become so serious.  In the haste of life and its stresses we do forget to “live, love and laugh”  It is easy to forget who we are, what we enjoy and who we want to be when bogged down by the responsibilities of adulthood.
Recently I witnessed the demise of this particular blogger as within this realm of blogging came a lot of judgement, scrutiny, opinions and negativity.
In turn the longer I keep this blog running the more evident to me it is that by deeming Chummies for the “childfree or childless” is more or less serving the same agenda as Mummy blogs – to appeal and categorise to the one genre.  In turn isolating the community of support.
When in actual fact we can all be in betweeners in some way.  Some mothers dream to have the freedom, time or money of the days before (not that they don’t love their little miracles), some people dream of a home, some people dream of travel others dream of structure. 
Having no children does not define who I am.  Just as having children doesn’t define who they are. 

So as much as mummy blogs and mothers groups are a valuable learning and interaction resource, they are manly directed as this-  purely you as a mother.

When in actual fact I do know that a lot of mothers really do value adult time and conversation, life outside of their children.  Of course there are the inevitable few that cannot separate the two and solely exist now to talk, repeat and live everything their child says, does, eats and poops.  But for me I value taking on board their stories, insight, trials, tribulations, excitement and growth journey but also highly appreciate that they switch back to – THEM!!.

So I embrace the invites, company and laughs  - you are not a leper for having no children, just as you are not a failure for having no investments or hard done by for not having travelled we all have our own journey.

So my posts from now on may be relative to our way of life, which is having no children at this stage in life.   But I enjoy writing and have been told by others they enjoy reading.  So to cure my unplanned duffness I am claiming this to be a broad blog
A boutique destination, a get together that still exists to inspire, motivate and support fellow chummies encouraging each other in their endeavours, careers and general being.
Open to all Chummies -
Chummies meaning by dictionary definition of the word chummy:
Friendly, close, affectionate, buddies
Whether childless, childfree, male, female, mother father, parents, widows whatever.
This is a positive non-judgemental platform of encouragement, love, life and laughter, remembering who we are and remembering the important things in life.  Because when we feel like CHUM (so chumpy you can carve it) we always have our chummies.